Friday, June 30, 2006

Renaldo Balkman

I'm not a big basketball fan, and I stopped following the Knicks after Jeff Van Gundy left town, but this was funny:

9:36 -- There are those moments in sports when you expect something great, and then it actually happens. And then there are those rare moments in sports when you expect something great, and something even greater happens. This was one of those moments: The Knicks on the clock, the crowd pushing for Marcus Williams, and then ...

--Stern: "With the 20th pick, the New York Knicks select ... Renaldo Balkman."

(Crowd explodes in horror.)

--Stern (over the boos): "Renaldo is not here."

--Patrick (without missing a beat): "And it's probably a good thing."

(Shot of a beaten-down Spike Lee laughing hysterically.)

9:36 -- That was fantastic. Everyone kept e-mailing me to write about Isiah and the Knicks last week ... what else was there to say? OF COURSE Isiah was meant to coach this team as his final job in the NBA before retiring to a life of greeting people at casinos and doing informercials. If somebody clogs your toilet, you ask him to clean up the mess. That's just the way life works. I'm telling you, we're going to remember the Isiah/Knicks Era the same way we remember things like Enron, the Hindenberg and the Bay of Pigs. It's reached that level. I don't know what else to say. Honestly. I have Knicks fans e-mailing me every day asking me if it's OK to root against their own team. What else can you say at this point?

(Wait, I know ... Renaldo Balkman!)
At least Yankee fans will have someone to feel better than during the offseason when they miss the playoffs this year and the Mets win it all!

Me, Me, Me Meme

1. What time did you get up this morning?

2. Diamonds or Pearls?

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
X3: The Last Stand

4. What is your favorite TV show?
Grey's Anatomy

5. What did you have for breakfast this morning?

6. What is your middle name?

7. What is your favorite cuisine?
I like a wide range of food, but I got in trouble last time for not saying "Anything my wife cooks." ;-)

8. What foods do you dislike?
Weird textures, especially mushy stuff.

9. Your favorite Potato chip?

10. What is your favorite CD at the moment?
The last mix CD I made.

11. what kind of car do you drive?
1998 Plymouth Breeze

12. Favorite sandwich?

13. What characteristics do you despise?
Wishy washiness and insincerity.

14. What are your favorite clothes?

15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
Isla Mujeres, Mexico

16. What color is your bedroom?
Sage, I think?

17. Favorite brand of clothing?
Old Navy

8. Where would you want to retire to?
Isla Mujeres, Mexico

19. Favorite time of day?
Early morning, right before waking up.

20. Where were you born?
New York, NY

21. What is your favorite sport?
Football and baseball equally.

22. Who do you least expect to send this back?
See final answer...

23. Person you expect to send it back first?
See final answer...

24. Coke or Pepsi?
Dr. Pepper

25. Are you a morning person or night owl?
Night owl

26. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with everyone!
Isaac started summer camp yesterday and Salomé's going to become a special ed teacher.

27. What did you want to be when you were little?
A lot of things, but writer was the most enduring.

28. What is your best childhood memory?
My memory sucks.

29. What are the different jobs you've had in your life?
Paper boy, library page, everything from busboy to bartender to short-order cook, bank teller, mechanic and parts clerk, circulation manager, emcee, writer, membership manager, financial planner, marketing manager, editor.

32. Eye Color?

33. Ever been to Africa?

34. Ever been toilet papering?

35. Been in a car accident?

36. Favorite day of the week?

37. Favorite restaurant?
Too many to name, but I've been itching to go back to Esperanto.

39. Favorite fast food restaurant?

40. How many times did you fail your driver's test?

41. Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail?
I get way too many emails to keep track of which came last.

42. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Midtown Comics

44. Who are you most curious about their responses to this questionnaire?
Anyone who takes the time to respond

45. Last person you went to dinner with?'s been a while; most likely Salomé.

46. What are you listening to right now?

47. What is your favorite Color?

48. How many tattoos do you have?

49. When is your birthday?
August 16, 1969

50. How many people are you sending this Email to?
None, but if you're reading this, consider yourself tagged. ;-)

Monday, June 26, 2006

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Birthdate: August 16

You're incredibly introverted and introspective. You live inside your head.

You spend a lot of alone time meditating and thinking.

People see you as withdrawn, and at times they are right.

You are caring and deep, but it may be difficult for you to show this side of yourself.

Your strength: Your original approach to thinking

Your weakness: You tend to shy away from others

Your power color: Pale blue

Your power symbol: Wavy line

Your power month: July

5 Things Tagomeme

Via Salomé; now consider yourself tagged!

5 things in my refrigerator:
1. Nestlé Quik Chocolate Syrup
2. Nathan's Brown Mustard
3. Gallon water dispenser
4. Assorted chocolate candies
5. 4 bottles of Heineken

5 things in my closet:
1. Shirts
2. Pants
3. Shoes
4. Comic books
5. My old Vectrex system

5 things in my pursebag:
1. Gameboy Advance SP
2. MP3 player
3. Composition notebook
4. Cell phone
5. Plastic baggie w/baby wipes

5 things in my car:
1. 2 Children's car seats
2. Stroller
3. 2 Folding lawn chairs
4. Isaac's Grow to Pro 3-in-1 Baseball Trainer
5. One each of Isaac and India's first sneakers

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Isaac the Graduate!

Isaac graduated from kindergarten last Wednesday, and thus ends his indoctrination into Catholicism! Next year...public school.

Seriously, though, as much as I hated their incessant nickel-and-dime fundraising (we drew the line at the not-so-nickel-and-dime $25 raffle tickets!) and their tendency to close because it was snowing in Pennsylvania, Isaac learned a lot this year. He can read on his own, has some basic math skills, and survived being the smallest kid in his class. It'll be interesting to see if he notices any significant differences switching to public school. He certainly won't miss the daily prayers!

Bonus footage: Hot Mom!

Wednesday, June 7, 2006

Rolling With the Punches

That's pretty much my rule of thumb when it comes to life in general: roll with the punches and wait for an opening to land your own, and when you do, make it a good one. Sometimes, though, life delivers a vicious flurry and you just need put up your dukes and start hitting back or you'll get knocked out.

I'm developing a plan for the rest of the year that will culminate in my not only participating in NaNoWriMo this year, but going into January 2007 with a completed manuscript ready for submission. To where, I have no idea, but first things first, yes?

Two good things to relieve stress: a game of softball (preferably one you win), and post-game Two Boots pizza with a cold bottle of Magic Hat #9.


EDIT: Coincidentally, I'm wearing #9 this season, representing my all-time favorite Yankee, Graig Nettles. Didn't make the connection when I first posted this!